Dream Job

Written by Grace Brang

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I applied for my Dream Job in September 2017. I’m not exaggerating; this was the position I had been envisioning ever since I knew I wanted to major in economics when I was in high school. I never thought I could get it, so I didn’t get too excited about applying. If it weren’t for the encouragement I got from my friends in the Economics Department, I don’t think I would have given the application a second thought before deleting the email regarding the position. Nevertheless, I freshened up my resume, secured letters of recommendation, sent the materials off, and did anything but get my hopes up.

 

While waiting to hear back, I pursued other opportunities and got interviews with great companies, and while I was not always thrilled about the specific positions I was interviewing for, I went through the hoops and made it to a few final rounds. I had never really pictured myself entering these fields I was applying for. I just kept reminding myself that it was unrealistic to get Dream Job immediately out of college.

 

The job search quickly became about more than just myself, too. I have been in a relationship with my best friend for 4 years, my little brother just confirmed his attendance at the U, I had colleagues from previous internships in Minneapolis that urged me to apply for positions in the same group I worked in over the summer… I was overwhelmed, and scariest of all, I was comfortable. I always envisioned myself being active and mobile - living all over the world, always go-go-going, never staying in one place for too long, always achieving “the next big thing,” whatever that may be. I was confused by my desire to establish roots in Minneapolis. I thought a later version of myself would look back with regret.

 

I said no to a stable, full-time job offer and rejected even the possibility of completing the final round interview for another. I realized that the odds of hearing back about Dream Job were virtually zero, so back to square one, I decided to pursue employment at the place I had completed my summer internships. I submitted a formal application and immediately received correspondence from the organization saying they were happy to have me back. It felt like things were falling into place, but I felt like something was missing.

 

In mid-November, I strolled into the Purple Onion one evening after classes. I ran into one of my past professors who wrote a letter of recommendation for me for Dream Job. I took a seat next to him, we chatted for a bit, and since he knew the timeline for the interview process, he knew better than to ask me if I had heard back or not. After catching up with each other, I opened up my laptop to an email saying I got an interview for Dream Job. In disbelief, all I could do was repeatedly whack my professor on the arm and throw my laptop at him so he could view the email and confirm that I was not hallucinating. I immediately began making my way down the phone tree and calling my family and close friends, sharing the news as best I could through an excited sob that plagued me for essentially the entire evening.

 

While I was in DC for the interview, my fear and nerves surrounding the interview transitioned into a much more irrational fear: actually getting the job. I know - why in the world would I be so confident to assume I would get the position, and then be scared over getting Dream Job? Well, I truly did not think I would get it, I was just worried that there was a very small possibility I would, and getting Dream Job meant giving up everything that was comfortable and making a new home away from family, friends and familiarity.

 

I ended up receiving an offer for Dream Job. My biggest dream and nightmare came true, and I was faced with the difficult decision of being comfortable or being completely true to myself, no matter the risk. After several days of deliberation, I accepted Dream Job.

 

Even though it’s been a few months since making the decision, I haven’t gotten over how much I will miss Minneapolis and the people here. I still cry in my car for a few minutes in the parking lot after getting back from nights out with my friends. I don’t know what it will be like to not live within 5 miles of them. I go out with them more often because of it. My heart aches every morning my boyfriend and I get caught up dancing and singing to our favorite songs while getting ready and miss the 3 we need to catch at 9:13 AM. I will miss that more than words can express. Sometimes I’m tempted to drive two hours home just to be with my family for the night because I know in a couple months, driving home will not be a possibility. I don’t want to regret not seeing my family while I can.

 

While I am indescribably grateful for Dream Job and all that comes with it, thinking about all the upcoming changes can be overwhelming. While I know I made the right decision, sometimes I forget what it felt like when my days of comfort and security weren’t numbered. While I know how unbelievably lucky I am, sometimes it doesn’t feel that way. While all of these things race through my head when I think about the near future, I know that somehow everything will be okay. While it scares me that I feel anything but excitement towards this new adventure, part of me thinks that this is normal, that this is life. Scary, uncertain, dynamic, exhilarating, and even when it’s hard to see, absolutely beautiful.